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pzabby 11-10-2011 10:56 PM

ethical question
 
my closest friends and I (group of five) are planning a grad trip this year. right now, it's between montreal march break madness (breakaway tours) where thousands of students flock to montreal for the break (drinking age 18 :D) or cuba in the summer. now in this tour, alot of hookups have happened and it might be cause of the booze, or the atmosphere, or having ur own room, or everything together, but either way, society puts an important claim on losing ur v-card and such and i'm wondering why? ive noticed jeff posting a couple times on why it should be with someone u truly love for the first time, and how he made a mistake, but never really elaborated. discuss

Someguy again 11-10-2011 11:02 PM

i was expecting a post on something like moral relativism

pzabby 11-10-2011 11:13 PM

and whys that?

fancylad 11-11-2011 11:17 AM

i dunno dude. Everyone's different. You would probably be the best person to answer your own question.

DVS 11-11-2011 11:18 AM

montreal you can get carried away with spending money yet cuba is a set price. Both are great places and I'm sure you'll hit both eventually anyways. Both destinations are like the most common for Torontonians

Barracuda 11-11-2011 11:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DVS (Post 578884)
montreal you can get carried away with spending money yet cuba is a set price. Both are great places and I'm sure you'll hit both eventually anyways. Both destinations are like the most common for Torontonians

I think what he's trying to say here is that you should always wear a condom. And sleep with someone you care about. Aaaand don't eat yellow snow.

DVS 11-11-2011 11:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Barracuda (Post 578885)
I think what he's trying to say here is that you should always wear a condom. And sleep with someone you care about. Aaaand don't eat yellow snow.

yes something like that

Chiggmo 11-11-2011 11:50 AM

It's your life, do as you please, and whatever you have to to enjoy it... Simple as that.

bladeofBG 11-11-2011 04:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pzabby (Post 578827)
my closest friends and I (group of five) are planning a grad trip this year. right now, it's between montreal march break madness (breakaway tours) where thousands of students flock to montreal for the break (drinking age 18 :D) or cuba in the summer. now in this tour, alot of hookups have happened and it might be cause of the booze, or the atmosphere, or having ur own room, or everything together, but either way, society puts an important claim on losing ur v-card and such and i'm wondering why? ive noticed jeff posting a couple times on why it should be with someone u truly love for the first time, and how he made a mistake, but never really elaborated. discuss

Society puts an important emphasis on losing your v-card because corporations make more money out of people having loose morals than they do when folk are waiting. The more you're ready to fuck, means more money for condom companies (as not juss married folk would be buying it), booze companies (they'd make more coin than juss folk buying a cold drink in the summer or on skiing trips with the attraction of it helpin folk get more loose) and so on & so forth.

Anyways, your dilemma is more a moral issue than it is an ethical one. Ethics means how you deal with others, and morals are your personal choices in how you live (which obviously translates in how you deal with others, but it's more than that).

I'm personally still a virgin and I'm 100% happy with it (I'm also turning 34yrs old next month). This has everything to do w/my simple faith in Christ than anything else; now I'm not tryna preach to you or judge you or your friends, but since you're asking, I will encourage you to not give in to what society wants from you regarding your v-card. I've had plenty of opportunity as a I'm a good looking man w/multiple talents that attract the opposite sex & I'm blessed enough that I still look like I'm in my early 20s. I simply find more satisfaction in beating sexual temptations than the pleasure of giving into it; I *LOVE* immersing myself into lookin at beautiful women (their faces, their figures, their everything...nothing is more beautiful in all of God's green earth), but that & flirtations is as far as Imma go.

Go to Montreal with your boys n stuff, have fun, but (since you're already having this debate in yourself) don't take it too far. Enjoy being around beautiful women dressed to kill, perhaps get some digies, but don't take it too far. Practice resisting the atmosphere, so when you're actually into it, you don't get carried away, but still have the type of fun that you won't regret.

pzabby 11-11-2011 05:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bladeofBG (Post 578943)
Society puts an important emphasis on losing your v-card because corporations make more money out of people having loose morals than they do when folk are waiting. The more you're ready to fuck, means more money for condom companies (as not juss married folk would be buying it), booze companies (they'd make more coin than juss folk buying a cold drink in the summer or on skiing trips with the attraction of it helpin folk get more loose) and so on & so forth.

Anyways, your dilemma is more a moral issue than it is an ethical one. Ethics means how you deal with others, and morals are your personal choices in how you live (which obviously translates in how you deal with others, but it's more than that).

I'm personally still a virgin and I'm 100% happy with it (I'm also turning 34yrs old next month). This has everything to do w/my simple faith in Christ than anything else; now I'm not tryna preach to you or judge you or your friends, but since you're asking, I will encourage you to not give in to what society wants from you regarding your v-card. I've had plenty of opportunity as a I'm a good looking man w/multiple talents that attract the opposite sex & I'm blessed enough that I still look like I'm in my early 20s. I simply find more satisfaction in beating sexual temptations than the pleasure of giving into it; I *LOVE* immersing myself into lookin at beautiful women (their faces, their figures, their everything...nothing is more beautiful in all of God's green earth), but that & flirtations is as far as Imma go.

Go to Montreal with your boys n stuff, have fun, but (since you're already having this debate in yourself) don't take it too far. Enjoy being around beautiful women dressed to kill, perhaps get some digies, but don't take it too far. Practice resisting the atmosphere, so when you're actually into it, you don't get carried away, but still have the type of fun that you won't regret.

i respect your answer, but really it hasnt answered why i shouldnt. if its simply because of god, christ, religion, etc then it really doesnt matter for me. im not giving into societal expectations or what not, i just want some. is there any other reason i'd regret it?

and 'cuda, why shouldnt i sleep with someone i dont care about is my real question. I mean whats the significance because i honestly dont see it. its just another act which supposedly feels awesome..

Aar_Canada 11-11-2011 05:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bladeofBG (Post 578943)
Society puts an important emphasis on losing your v-card because corporations make more money out of people having loose morals than they do when folk are waiting. The more you're ready to fuck, means more money for condom companies (as not juss married folk would be buying it), booze companies (they'd make more coin than juss folk buying a cold drink in the summer or on skiing trips with the attraction of it helpin folk get more loose) and so on & so forth.

Anyways, your dilemma is more a moral issue than it is an ethical one. Ethics means how you deal with others, and morals are your personal choices in how you live (which obviously translates in how you deal with others, but it's more than that).

I'm personally still a virgin and I'm 100% happy with it (I'm also turning 34yrs old next month). This has everything to do w/my simple faith in Christ than anything else; now I'm not tryna preach to you or judge you or your friends, but since you're asking, I will encourage you to not give in to what society wants from you regarding your v-card. I've had plenty of opportunity as a I'm a good looking man w/multiple talents that attract the opposite sex & I'm blessed enough that I still look like I'm in my early 20s. I simply find more satisfaction in beating sexual temptations than the pleasure of giving into it; I *LOVE* immersing myself into lookin at beautiful women (their faces, their figures, their everything...nothing is more beautiful in all of God's green earth), but that & flirtations is as far as Imma go.

Go to Montreal with your boys n stuff, have fun, but (since you're already having this debate in yourself) don't take it too far. Enjoy being around beautiful women dressed to kill, perhaps get some digies, but don't take it too far. Practice resisting the atmosphere, so when you're actually into it, you don't get carried away, but still have the type of fun that you won't regret.

How do you know if you've never given in? :cookie:

And it's not corporations, it's our sex drive, our bodies, our minds. Simple. Gah, have sex dude.

LX 11-11-2011 05:14 PM

Just fuck safe and fuck consensually, if it feels right. Forget about what it means to society. It's all about you and your partner needing to figure out what you want and expect.

Barracuda 11-11-2011 05:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pzabby (Post 578948)
i respect your answer, but really it hasnt answered why i shouldnt. if its simply because of god, christ, religion, etc then it really doesnt matter for me. im not giving into societal expectations or what not, i just want some. is there any other reason i'd regret it?

and 'cuda, why shouldnt i sleep with someone i dont care about is my real question. I mean whats the significance because i honestly dont see it. its just another act which supposedly feels awesome..

Well, then do whatcha gotta.

Just don't hurt anyone. Don't make a girl think you care about her if you don't. To some people there's no "significance", as you said... but to some people, there's quite a bit.

And if you end up with a girl who doesn't care that you're only in it to get laid, you still have to be careful. It likely means she's, uh... done it before. And you never know where another person has been. Wear a condom, no matter what.

I don't know how old you are, but I'm assuming you know the importance of that. If you don't, you aren't ready. Plain and simple. Diseases happen, babies happen... that takes the "fun" out of a random lay, my friend. It can be a serious thing.

Aar_Canada 11-11-2011 05:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pzabby (Post 578948)
i respect your answer, but really it hasnt answered why i shouldnt. if its simply because of god, christ, religion, etc then it really doesnt matter for me. im not giving into societal expectations or what not, i just want some. is there any other reason i'd regret it?

and 'cuda, why shouldnt i sleep with someone i dont care about is my real question. I mean whats the significance because i honestly dont see it. its just another act which supposedly feels awesome..

Sometimes, I think the people who might feel bad about it feel that way because they feel ashamed which means they care too much about what other people might think. It's more common with women because society likes to throw around a couple words - slut and whore - to demean and control them. If you're comfortable with yourself and don't give two craps what other people might think, go for it.

Aar_Canada 11-11-2011 05:18 PM

And er, what 'Cuda posted at the same time as me.

MrClutch 11-11-2011 05:41 PM

When the time comes and your with a girl and things are picking up, follow what your conscience tells you. If it doesnt feel right, then I'm sure you'll feel guilty continuing but if not then enjoy your night

bladeofBG 11-11-2011 11:53 PM

@ pzabby

Well I'm not related to you, nor do we share a common faith, nor are we close friends, so there's little else I can share w/you on the matter without getting too personal.

Other than that, there are two things I'd mention (which I readily admit are in line w/my faith, but also clearly seperate from it). One is to watch the 2004 remake of 'The Stepford Wives.' I think it's an underrated movie which went underfunded by hollywood & it somewhat surprises me that it's not remembered (though perhaps that's juss the sci-fi & religious geek in me); I saw it for the first time earlier this week. Basically, women aren't robots; but reducing them to random-fuck encounters is akin treating them as such.

The second is this: Remember Wilt Chamberlain? We're all die-hard NBA fans so I'm sure you do. The dude has most likely fucked more girls than any man in the history of our planet, and even wrote a book about it. But I learned something about him from the local paper when he died 12yrs ago. And that is in a August 1998 interview with him, he said (something to the exact effect of) "All you folk today thinking it's cool to sleep with all these different women, let me tell you, it's way more fulfilling to sleep with one woman consistently, over a long period of time."

Edit: Found the link of Wilt's original quote. It's the last paragraph in this link:
http://static.espn.go.com/nba/news/1...12/110905.html

Wilt Quote: ""With all of you men out there who think that having a thousand different ladies is pretty cool, I have learned in my life I've found out that having one woman a thousand different times is much more satisfying."


@ Aar_Canada

The barometer of absolute freedom of 'choice' is how you know if you've resisted or not.

You're right on that point you made, that it's ultimately our decisions more than it is corporations. However I mentioned corporations because many of them don't hesitate to exploit human weakness & the things that can & do happen when a lack of discipline reigns. So given the nature of pzabby's original question, I feel I'm as right as you in my mention of corporations.

pzabby 11-12-2011 01:24 AM

thanks everyone for the input, its been actually a big help

Renihan_00 11-13-2011 10:33 PM

You are the only person that has to live with your decisions.

Do whatever you want......but wrap it up if you do.

Bill Haverchuck 11-14-2011 12:01 AM



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