I finally figured out why I'm not married yet lol... - Page 2
Old 11-25-2008, 02:21 PM   #21 (permalink)
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excellent read ToRap.

if i could recommend a book to any SYM it would be "the Game".
i read it twice actually.
i know it sounds geeky, but i've used a few tricks/lines/tips from the book (when i was unsure what to do) and it actually worked in getting me laid. LOL.
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:23 PM   #22 (permalink)
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TO, AWESOME find! I sent the link to a friend of mine who'll be very interested in it.

I find it alarming though on two fronts:

A. Some of the comments by the men seem to point in the direction of a return to misogny or a slight offshoot of it.

B. Darwinian thought being used inappropriately once again in regards to a discussion involving cultural attitudes and behaviours.

What's dangerous in all of this is that men are seeking to simply relations between the other sex, essentially searching for the hierarchacl (sp) order that many were accustomed to between 1900-1959 where men were in essence dominant and had all say. The fact that women now have the ability to choose which direction they wish to go to and that this has irked men, is alarming. Alarming because men wish to simplify relations once again.

Seriously TO, great find.
Thanks bud. I feel a bit bad about it because it's not my intention to offend our female posters here (who all seem like great chicks) but a lot of things rang true for me. I still think that it's a very interesting article that should spark some debate too.

In terms of the points that you brought up... yes, I can see what you're saying now (re: the misogynistic view) but I didn't read it that way.

I don't think that most men are bothered at all by women levelling the playing field in society. I think that it's more a matter of the INEQUALITY that's still prevalent in the courts that keeps men apprehensive.... and the general confusion that seems inevitable these days when it comes to trying to relate to women and "satisfy" them.

I'm glad that you enjoyed it though. I still consider you one of the most "intellectual" people that I've met so I'm always very interested to hear your opinions on various topics.
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:25 PM   #23 (permalink)
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I never wanted to get married and my wife was fine with that or so she says.

I begged her to hop around on one leg afterwards or do a handstand, but clearly she didn't listen...
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:31 PM   #24 (permalink)
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excellent read ToRap.

if i could recommend a book to any SYM it would be "the Game".
i read it twice actually.
i know it sounds geeky, but i've used a few tricks/lines/tips from the book (when i was unsure what to do) and it actually worked in getting me laid. LOL.
Lol... oh I bought and read "The Game" when I was on a flight to vancouver a few months ago.... and a lot of what's said in there is bang on lol... as sad as that is. I can look back now and see that the friends who I considered "players" used these tactics with incredible proficiency.... and they rarely failed. Highly entertaining.

A very good read for women too lol.. if only to see the bullshit that some guys will use on you.
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:38 PM   #25 (permalink)
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Screw Big. I woulda gone with Aiden.

I've dated the super-duper nice guys. Sweet to a fault.

I've only BRIEFLY dated major assholes.

For me, it only works if you're a nice, compassionate and loving guy, who may have a bit of edge the same way I do.

I know lotsa girls DO go for bad boys, but they always end up hurt and unhappy.

Stupid.
You're wise beyond your years then 'Cuda... lol.... because it seems like it takes a lot of women MANY years to figure that out... and some never do even so.

And I'm not dealing in absolutes here... I get pissed every time that I hear one of my female friends say "all guys are pigs/assholes/etc".... I KNOW that there are solid women out there... they just all seem to be already taken/married lol.
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:40 PM   #26 (permalink)
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And I'm not dealing in absolutes here... I get pissed every time that I hear one of my female friends say "all guys are pigs/assholes/etc".... I KNOW that there are solid women out there... they just all seem to be already taken/married lol.
Do you ever think your looking too hard TO? Some of the best women I've met and dated in my past were ones that I met when I least expected.
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:40 PM   #27 (permalink)
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Marriage isn't for every one

Some people just have friends with benefits and that's cool with them
TO2.... I think that as you get older you'll find that that gets stale.... and complicated lol. I've NEVER seen a relationship like that work over the long-term.
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:44 PM   #28 (permalink)
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You're wise beyond your years then 'Cuda... lol.... because it seems like it takes a lot of women MANY years to figure that out... and some never do even so.

And I'm not dealing in absolutes here... I get pissed every time that I hear one of my female friends say "all guys are pigs/assholes/etc".... I KNOW that there are solid women out there... they just all seem to be already taken/married lol.
Yep, everything I'm saying goes both ways.

And I'm not saying YOU deal in absolutes, just the guys in the article and so many that I know.

But dude... I've met ya... I've seen no negatives about you, so you're bound to have a damn near perfect girly at some point.

Mama knows.
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:45 PM   #29 (permalink)
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Do you ever think your looking too hard TO? Some of the best women I've met and dated in my past were ones that I met when I least expected.
That's what I'm saying.



Damn straight, Doc!
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:48 PM   #30 (permalink)
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Do you ever think your looking too hard TO? Some of the best women I've met and dated in my past were ones that I met when I least expected.
Lol... I'm not really looking though. At least I don't think so. I'm not all over the dating websites or hitting the bar scene or begging friends for hookups.... jus doing my thing for the most part. Just gets a little trying at times when ALL of your friends are in serious relationships, getting married, having kids etc...

I think that I go through this rant about every 6 months like clockwork so hopefully everyone here is used to it by now. haha
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:49 PM   #31 (permalink)
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But dude... I've met ya... I've seen no negatives about you, so you're bound to have a damn near perfect girly or man at some point.

Mama knows.
Never say never.
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:49 PM   #32 (permalink)
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So where the heck did everyone meet the significant others?

Now I'm all curious.....
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:50 PM   #33 (permalink)
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Do you ever think your looking too hard TO? Some of the best women I've met and dated in my past were ones that I met when I least expected.
Agree with that. Boyfriend was a Chapters employee who helped me pick out a book for my father's birthday.

I personally prefer sweet chaps to the ones who treat them like crap, and I know a lot of ladies (many taken but some fantastic ones who are single) who feel the same way.
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:50 PM   #34 (permalink)
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Never say never.
You're already hitched Doc so that ship has sailed...
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:51 PM   #35 (permalink)
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Lol... I'm not really looking though. At least I don't think so. I'm not all over the dating websites or hitting the bar scene or begging friends for hookups.... jus doing my thing for the most part. Just gets a little trying at times when ALL of your friends are in serious relationships, getting married, having kids etc...

I think that I go through this rant about every 6 months like clockwork so hopefully everyone here is used to it by now. haha
What's the rush though TO? Is it because you want to start a family soon and you feeling pressure at your "old" age or just want to find that certain someone that you can settle down with?
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:53 PM   #36 (permalink)
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Lol... I'm not really looking though. At least I don't think so. I'm not all over the dating websites or hitting the bar scene or begging friends for hookups.... jus doing my thing for the most part. Just gets a little trying at times when ALL of your friends are in serious relationships, getting married, having kids etc...

I think that I go through this rant about every 6 months like clockwork so hopefully everyone here is used to it by now. haha
Ha ha. Hey mate, I hear you. I may only be 24, but quite a few of my friends have been getting married as of late, and a lot of people are asking Boyfriend and I when we are going to get engaged. It's definitely, definitely, most definitely trying.
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:53 PM   #37 (permalink)
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as some of you may know, i was engaged.... around May, i decided to take a break from the relationship and i decided to be single again.
it didnt go over well with the fiance, but we were together since i was 20 (8 years), and i needed some 'me' time.
it wasnt that i didnt love her anymore, it was because i wasnt ready for marriage and i needed a break from life, a break from responsibility and in general; i just wanted to be free. (selfish, i know)
I told her all of this and i was surprised how well she accepted it.
lesson learned #1 - always tell your woman the truth (you'd be surprisesd hom much more she will respect you).

initially, my plan was to get laid like i was 19 again...
i'm talking sex, sex, and more sex....
thankfully, i'm one sexy mofo, so i was already ahead in the game... but being out of the dating scene for such a long time, i needed to do my research. i spent a few weeks reading books, articles, and web forums that would give me a better insight on the mind of a woman.
from 'cocky-funny', to alpha male, to general advice - i found it all.
within a few weeks, i put my game to the test.
clubbing, hook ups, picking up girls on the street... i did it all.
within a few months, i had gotten so much ass it was unbelievable.
i wont go into the nitty-gritty, but lets just say i got so much sex i was actually sick of it. seriously, i didnt want it anymore.
i started feeling so empty inside... i mean, my plan all along was to get as much ass as i could, but now that it was becoming a reality - it just wasnt fun... i actually hated myself and the guy i was becoming. i started feeling depressed because this wasnt me, this wasnt the guy i grew up to be.

by september, i couldnt take it anymore...
even though my plan of getting ass came to fruition, i couldnt stand myself and i was depressed inside.
i used to hold women in the highest regard.... but they just seemed so ordinary now... just objects. the only woman that i wanted now, was the one i let go of 4 months earlier.... she was the only one for me, and i knew it.
everything else seemed so boring.

long story short, luckily, i got back with my fiance and we worked everything out.
i learned so much over the summer its amazing.
1) woman want want they cant have.
2) if interested, woman will do ANYTHING (and i mean anything!) for you.
3) the main weapon any man can have is not money..or looks. its confidence.
4) the grass is NOT greener on the other side.
5) sex gets pretty boring.
6) if you're happy in life, you are more powerful than you could ever know.
7) how can you be totally irresistable to woman? knowing that you already are.
*that is the most powerful mindset you can ever have.

so its now Novemeber, i'm back with my love and i'm a loser again... and i wouldnt have it any other way!
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:54 PM   #38 (permalink)
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Thanks bud. I feel a bit bad about it because it's not my intention to offend our female posters here (who all seem like great chicks) but a lot of things rang true for me. I still think that it's a very interesting article that should spark some debate too.

In terms of the points that you brought up... yes, I can see what you're saying now (re: the misogynistic view) but I didn't read it that way.

I don't think that most men are bothered at all by women levelling the playing field in society. I think that it's more a matter of the INEQUALITY that's still prevalent in the courts that keeps men apprehensive.... and the general confusion that seems inevitable these days when it comes to trying to relate to women and "satisfy" them.

I'm glad that you enjoyed it though. I still consider you one of the most "intellectual" people that I've met so I'm always very interested to hear your opinions on various topics.
See, I think a majority of men, or at least from what I hear, have issues with women in society or gaining societal status. You still look around, and women still make less than men, are generally regarded as "bitches" in the work place and are still very much so, sexualized (see Sarah Palin). And it's men who create these "strata" (for lack of a better term) for women.

And again, for me something like "the Game" is dangerous because it simplifies actions between the two sexes as a game that someone has to win in the end. Am I the only one here who is troubled by that?

But again, my greater concern is the use of Darwin in these matters. Once discussion enters into concepts of natural selection in regards to gender roles and cultural discussion. Far too dangerous.
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:56 PM   #39 (permalink)
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Its is all very simply based on certain needs, traits and instincts that are buried deep inside of the brain.


Correct me if I am wrong, but I know im not, but all women want 3 very important things things, protection, compasion and for them to be heard.
everthing else in addittion to those 2 traits is gravy. ie: humour, spontanaity, etc...

If you show these things then women will find you....
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Old 11-25-2008, 02:56 PM   #40 (permalink)
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You're already hitched Doc so that ship has sailed...
Doc + TO = Could-Have-Been-New-Mega-Couple.

Aw.
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