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Old 08-13-2010, 10:13 AM   #22 (permalink)
Bill Haverchuck
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Originally Posted by INSIDER View Post
the exact same thing can be said for being single...
being single certainly isnt for everyone, unfortunately alot of people never find that one special person in their life, and figure that out when they are sad and lonely and die alone wishing they had family in the end.... lol.
Of course. I think the thing people like Jeff and I are reacting to is the very common place notion that people are supposed to get married. A lot of these problems have to do with expectations people place on themselves and others, and not necessarily with the structure of marriage. People just need to take the time to figure out what they really want.

Originally Posted by jeffb View Post
I think if anything you need to find someone who wants the same things out of life.
Yeah, Jeff. I completely agree. And you need to take the time to figure out if your companion wants the same things. It probably doesn't hurt to have a couple of tough conversations before jumping into things.

To be honest, I think a lot of the douchebags Corey is talking about can be avoided. When you're dating somebody, if you pay careful attention, red flags go off. Sometimes they are minor things that just indicate a small point of contention concerning your world view, but other times those red flags reveal that the other person is a huge douche. I'm not saying every cheater can be identified, but I think the type of jerk who does what Corey is worried about will show some signs of douchery much earlier on. If a person with integrity looks for another person with integrity, I honestly believe they can find one. If you marry for the wrong reasons and don't take due dillegence in finding a spouse, you run the risk of things ending poorly. But Marriages/long term relationships don't have to end poorly, with one side winning and the other losing. Mature people would just recognize things are not working and move on. And if kids are involved, they'd work together to do what is in the best interest of the kids, since by definition, those mature people would care far more about the kids than "winning" the divorce settlement or "losing" it. /captain obvious/
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